The Blessings Of Not Being Married As Planned

This was not the blog I had planned. I have two finished blogs and had told a friend I may flip a coin to choose between them. However, I was thrown a major curve ball which has caused me to wish to delay release of those blogs to go with a third option: Write this blog and share it first.

Enjoy…

When life does not go according to plan and you end up single, like me.

My plan was to be married by twenty-one. I’m the relationship kind of guy. I wanted to share my life with someone special more than anything else, wanted children, and therefore had planned to be married as soon as possible. However, my plans to marry that high school crush passed along with my twenties and, despite my heroic efforts, I remain single to this day.

Anyhow, I decided to write this blog so my single (and wanting) friends can have a reason to smile. I’m single, it was not entirely my choice, it has been extremely painful at times, profound loneliness stinks, and yet God has been faithful. There have been many moments of deep despair and hopelessness, but I am here to tell you that there’s reason to hope and be happy.

I’ve decided to write about the things I would have missed out on and what I would not be today had I married when I planned. It is hard to imagine what I would be for certain today had I married young and we have no way to know that counterfactual reality of might have been, yet there are some things that I am fairly certain about.

Six things I would not be had I as a married planned:

I would not be a blogger. You are reading this blog because I have time to write it as a single person. Writing is something I do not completely enjoy, but it is something that seems to be a gift I have and I do it mostly as an act of faith. This blog was started a couple years ago as a response to the questions in my mind about my purpose in life that came after a “no” from a girl who was the embodiment of a the Mennonite ideal for a wife.

I would not own an awesome car. Earlier this year it was my privilege to buy something most married men can only dream about and that being a brand new Shelby GT350 Mustang. Sure, we should not live our lives for such material things, but it was nice to see my hard work and diligent saving pay off in a tangible (very thrilling) way. So, while I would trade this mechanical beast for a wife and family in a heart beat, I still enjoy the memories of many grins and the experience.

I would not know the pain of rejection. Pain is bad, right? Well, not entirely actually, pain is temporary and with pain comes empathy and the ability to appreciate pleasure all the more. Sure, we avoid pain, we probably should avoid unnecessary pain, and yet pain helps me to identify with those who suffer. More significantly, it has allowed me the privilege of a deeper appreciation and understanding of my Lord and Savior who suffered for our sins.

I would not have the unique perspective that I do. My experience as a single person with unfulfilled desires and social needs often unmet gives me a special vision for the church. I say unfulfilled needs thinking about Maslow’s hierarchy of needs and the idea that people need deeper connection to thrive. I can recall the many times I felt spiritually deficient, isolate from human touch and longed for a church that was more than superficially concerned. The fact is, we were made for meaningful human connection and without it we become unhealthy.

I would have missed out on many wonderful friendships. As part of my dealing with my own disappointment I became more open to being the answer for the needs of other people. Because of what I had gone through it was my desire to help others in similar circumstances. I have stepped out in faith and as a result have been very blessed. The friendships gained would likely be impossible had I been a married man. Investments made in Christian love for other people always seem to pay back in surprising ways.

I would not have been asked on a date. There is a first time for everything and I had a first over the weekend. When I wrote my last blog it was not with a clear personal agenda or self-pity. There are some unanswered questions right now that keep me from being ready to make a serious romantic commitment. My blog was to create awareness of an issue that is not being adequately addressed in the conservative Mennonite church that I know. One thing for certain, I had not planned on being asked out on a coffee date by a very intriguing young woman.

But I do like my unplanned blessings and especially when they come because of faithful actions.

I have much to be thankful for as one blessed more than he deserves.

My next blog will be on the topic of marriage as martyrdom. But before that I wanted to encourage my single friends to see the bigger perspective. Those who remain single (because they were rejected by the world’s standard and not for prideful selfish reasons) may obtain the bigger crown because they are most like our Lord and Savior.

So, to my single friends, remain faithful. God may have some unplanned surprises in your future of a very pleasant variety. Trust God, the one who holds the future, and not your own human perspective or a worldly understanding. Live in true faith today and may God soon grant you the desires of your heart.

Smile too, it’s attractive.

Does One Voice Make A Difference?

“‘Meaningless! Meaningless!’ says the Teacher. ‘Utterly meaningless! Everything is meaningless.'”

The book of Ecclesiastes paints a bleak picture of life. It describes how cycles of nature repeat and nothing really changes from before. We labor yet we are soon to be forgotten along with our labor.

If that is how he felt then, then how should one feel today? Meaning can be further lost in our current understanding of the vastness of time and space. We rush with an ever quickening pace into a sea of nothingness.

“Then I applied myself to the understanding of wisdom, and also of madness and folly, but I learned that this, too, is a chasing after the wind. For with much wisdom comes much sorrow; the more knowledge, the more grief.” (Ecclesiastes 1:17-18)

Wisdom goes hand and hand with sorrow because the unwise do not realize they are unwise. So a wise person is often stuck watching the foolishness of others unfold before their eyes without being able to do anything to stop it. Knowledge of the patterns of people and history is often a source of painful helplessness.

What can a compassionate and intelligent person do but mourn the world then bury themselves in pleasurable indulgences so they can forget?

The excesses of king Solomon, the writer of Ecclesiastes, were not a product of foolishness, they were an attempt to escape a maddening reality where all men (wise or foolish) would eventually perish. His knowledge and wisdom made all of his pursuits become empty.

“The wise have eyes in their heads, while the fool walks in the darkness; but I came to realize that the same fate overtakes them both. Then I said to myself, ‘The fate of the fool will overtake me also. What then do I gain by being wise?’ I said to myself, ‘This too is meaningless.’ For the wise, like the fool, will not be long remembered; the days have already come when both have been forgotten. Like the fool, the wise too must die!” (Ecclesiastes 2:14-16)

It is a reality that is inescapable, watching people make the same mistakes over and over again, seeing where the patterns of today will lead, being treated as a fool by those whom you are trying to warn, unable to convince them until it is too late and the die is already cast. It is enough to make a wise person stop wasting their efforts.

This is the battle a writer who wishes to make a difference in the world must face. There is no point in writing if there’s nobody to read or comprehend. We wish to be understood so that others might gain from our experience and insights. But in a world of over seven billion voices who has time to listen? How can true wisdom seperate itself from the inane chatter?

Even my triumphs, even when a blog I write hits a chord and is viewed a thousand times, there is often a feeling of morose that follows. My writing is never good enough and even if it was who’s actually listening? I feel compelled to speak my mind yet then wonder if it is meaningful that I do say a word. I fight off discouragement until it is time to write again.

However, what matters to me ultimately is not the thousands of anonymous visitors here. No, it is the people, small and unimportant to the world, whom I’ve been able to encourage. Whatever lofty ideas I share here matter very little in the end. What matters is those who have found my love to be genuine and will remember someone cared about them.

The meaning in my life doesn’t come from being important to the world. My meaning comes from being remembered and appreciated by those unnoticed and forgotten by the world. If our efforts make a positive difference for one person then it is enough.

My voice might not make much difference in the world. But if I can change the world for one person and give them hope or answers then I have made a world of difference to them.

I find the most meaning in life when I narrow my focus to loving one person.

Thoughts Of Anonymity

Walking down the sidewalk in Baltimore. Looking for a place to eat after the company that was supposed to load me ran out of corn. It was too late to find anything else, so I’m stranded for the night without a shower since yesterday afternoon. I’m not sure how I feel about it. On one hand I could be annoyed that someone else cared that little about my inconvenience, loss of time and income, that they didn’t make the effort to know there was enough corn. I mean, it isn’t that difficult to know, the pile is there in the open and all they needed to do is look then make a call. But, on the other hand, although sticky and sweaty from two days of July weather, I’m still alive and well. I’m free to walk to a restaurant in what appears to be a nice part of the city. I’m the scruffy guy amongst the people out on their jogs. I probably don’t look to much worse than I typically do. So why not enjoy the moment? Still, I might rather be home doing nothing. However, I’m one of those Americans who does what they are told, it is what keeps the economy going and yet is it good? Should a guy my age be walking anonymously down the streets of a city where nobody knows him and nobody seems to care to know him? I don’t think I want to think about it. I will eat, maybe for a moment forget that I do not belong here and be quietly happy as the world passes by…

A Tempest in a Coffee Cup?

One may think from the news coverage that Christians are out, torches and pitchforks in hand, looking for coffee shops to burn. The story is that Starbucks isn’t exploiting Christmas enough and this lack of proper capitalization for a profit of holiday has offended the sentiments of the unwashed religionist hoards.

This fury seems to have originated with a humorous poke at a bland Starbucks holiday cup design. It was escalated by a fuddy-duddy blowhard extraordinaire (aka Joshua Feuerstein) who, apparently not seeing the joke, posted a video that urged a movement to trick hapless minions of secularism (aka Starbucks employees) into saying Merry Christmas.

And, since then—like that bar fight where nobody knows which drunken idiot started it or why they are fighting to begin with—the story of angry Christians has exploded into a media fiasco. But strangely the two main characters in this brawl do not seem to exist as much more than mythological creatures and that has led some to wonder if the whole ordeal is a fabrication.

Where are these offended Christians?

In my cadre of conservative Christian social media commentating friends, I have yet to see one who is offended by the Starbucks design. In fact, of my coreligionist friends voicing an opinion, I have observed two main camps:

1) The Apologists, or those annoyed by other Christians who are offended by Starbucks cups and have taken to social media to scold these theoretical entitlement-minded embarrassments to the Christian cause.

2) The Sanctimonious, or those who are suspicious that this controversy is created by the liberal irreligious media and take their high horse to condemn those annoyed as being pawns in this imagined nefarious plot.

Then there’s one last group made of non-religious friends:

3) The Amused, or those who watch with a little gleefulness, are not overly suspicious of the media and have little trouble imagining Christians that feel they are entitled to special treatment or would become outraged over something as silly as Starbucks cup.

My own opinion is that the whole thing has gotten blown out of proportion. It has likely only gained traction because we are already accustomed to the cultural wars that take place over issues similar to this. There is usually a skirmish or two this time of year (whether arguing for and against nativity scenes or some other cultural expressions of Christianity) and this has primed our pumps to expect it.

I also do contend, again, that Joshua Feuerstein represents a small segment of the general Christian population. There’s always those who are perpetually offended on behalf of their own tribe (look at the Halloween costume controversy at Yale and the chaos at Mizzou as examples) and yet whether or not these outspoken activists represent much more than themselves is an open question. My own anecdotal evidence suggests that those outraged by the cups are, at the most, a fringe element even amongst fundamentalists.

What’s with the media coverage, anyhow?

If one wants to study the interplay of the media echo chamber and social media viral phenomena they should start here. There seems to be a positive feedback loop at work in this where a one-man movement on YouTube, picked up by the mainstream media, was then sifted through the amplifier of social media and each step promoting more to add their own opinions. This has gone through several cycles of growing in magnitude. Even Donald Trump weighed in suggesting a boycott of the mermaid logo brand.

I do not think this is a media reporting this ‘controversy’ is a coordinated attempt to discredit Christians. Professional journalists are not any different from the rest of us and will report on what is the latest buzz as we do. In the age of social media the feedback loop is faster and the amplification quicker than ever. By the time people start breathing again, we all feel a bit duped and start to wonder how the insanity got started.

Newsflash: All news is manufactured!

And, furthermore, we all participate in manufacturing news when we share about events that interest us. We present a product of our own perspective whenever we tell other people about anything. As a professional news reporter, we also select the facts we believe are relevant and omit those that seem inconsequential. We carefully craft our words to reach our target audience and create a narrative based in our own worldview.

The adage “if it bleeds it leads” holds generally true. We are drawn to controversy and this latest fracas over Starbucks cups has struck a cord or we wouldn’t be talking about it. There are evidently enough perpetually outraged Christians like Feuerstein to make a premise of widespread butthurt believable. He may be a crude caricature of us, but there’s a reason that he’s not taken as parody and that’s likely because he’s representative of a type of person we know does exist.

My decaffeinated analysis of the issue…

Yet, the bigger story is that most people (Christian and secular alike) are seemingly more offended by the controversy itself than the plain red cups that started it. So maybe we should be careful not to get too carried away in our own outrage over the outrage that may or may not be an outrage at all. There are plenty of people sharing dumb opinions (Bill Nye on abortion for example) and this is probably a good reason to reserve judgment until the facts are spoken.

Anyhow, for the record, the only problem I have with Starbucks is the inferior quality of their brackish liquid. I prefer my coffee with milk, sugar, in a Dunkin Donuts cup and agnostic. If that offends you, then please, by all means, do complain and start a movement or something—I will sip away amused as my blog views climb.

“…whoever wants to become great among you must be your servant, and whoever wants to be first must be your slave—just as the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many.” (Matthew 20:26-28)

Love: Feeling or Choice?

This blog is about ideas and the idea that ideas matter. I believe the ideas people have can dramatically influence the direction of their lives. Our choices, based in our ideas, could actually help shape reality in a ways not previously understood.

The view that seems popular today makes people simply products of the universe. We emphasize the role of genetics and the influence of environmental factors in shaping what a person is, which is an idea that is certainly not without merit. We bear a close resemblance to our parents for a reason and had no choice in determining that. There’s also a good explanation of why I am writing this in English rather than Chinese.

Obviously we have a given nature and are influenced by the nurture we received, which could lead to a ‘it is what it is’ fatalistic view that we have no choice or free will and ability to determine the future. But could there be more than that? Is it possible that the universe is only an influence and not a dictator of our consciousness? Could it be that our own consciousness acts as a co-creator of the future universe?

Advances in physics have opened a whole new realm of possibilities. The wave-particle duality of quantum mechanics is a paradox that suggests there is a bigger picture of the universe and one that could put our own consciousness in a far more important role than previously understood. If our observation actually shapes reality at a quantum level (collapsing the wave function) then the future may not actually be determined outside of our own mind and will as is a common assumption.

If the future is not a destiny and is in fact something we co-create, then that could change many things including our ideas on love, which leads to the question…

Is love an existent feeling or a willful choice?

Both religious and secular people have seemed to have embraced a fatalistic view of love. We could be scientific and point to natural explanations like pheromones, cultural expectations, chance opportunity, etc. It is basically to conclude that love is something pressed out of a myriad of factors that all combine at the right time—which is a view that makes love seem sort of like sausage. The religious, on the other hand, may turn to a meant-to-be (or God-did-it) rational to explain love and downplay choice.

Our culture, religious or otherwise, tends to emphasize the feelings of attraction above all else. Love is something we are told we should ‘fall’ into and that there is a ‘right’ person out there for everyone. The idea is that attraction produces a feeling that produces a choice that produces commitment and ends with happily ever after.

Unfortunately, I believe this is a view of love that has produced a great deal of disappointment and disillusionment in our day. It doesn’t work for many people. For some the problem is that they never find someone who produces that feeling of attraction enough to make them commit and they remain single or go from one relationship to the next in search of it. The problem for others is that they marry based in superficial feelings, eventually those feelings fade away and they want out of the commitment.

In both cases (above) the idea of love centers around feelings of attraction and presents love as a product of circumstances outside of our own control.

But what if there is an alternative view? What if we flip the order of things and put commitment first? Or, rather than love being a fate produced by an initial attraction that eventually ends in commitment and happily ever after, could love be a commitment to love that lead to a continual choice that produces a deepening relationship that produces a feeling of love and marital bliss?

It is my view that love is less of an ‘it is what it is’ fate and more an ‘it is what we make it’ choice. I believe the idea of love as a choice would produce healthier more sustainable relationships than the current popular view. We believe we would see a reversal in trends towards non-commitment if we stopped waiting for the ‘right’ feeling to come and started to be more actively loving to others even when the feelings do not exist.

What is the (proper) Christian view of love?

In the American church there is a heavy emphasis on experience and emotion in worship. We want music, we want excitement and entertainment, because the more feeling we have in the moment the more we love God, right?

Wrong.

Christian faith is not supposed to be primarily about feelings or ‘spiritual’ experience. Christian faith should be about obedience to the Spirit of love and that is the true evidence of faith according to Jesus:

“A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.” (John 13:34-35)

Many Christians have confused positive emotions for spiritual depth. A person who proclaims the loudest how great God is and puts on the biggest public display of praise is not necessarily the one who loves God the most. The Gospel presents a different view of love that doesn’t resonate as well with our feelings based culture. Jesus says, “if you love me, keep my commandments,” (John 14:15) and equates love with obedience.

To obey Jesus means to love others as we wish to be loved (Luke 6:31) and to love perfectly like God does:

“You have heard that it was said, ‘Love your neighbor and hate your enemy.’ But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, that you may be children of your Father in heaven. He causes his sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous. If you love those who love you, what reward will you get? Are not even the tax collectors doing that? And if you greet only your own people, what are you doing more than others? Do not even pagans do that? Be perfect, therefore, as your heavenly Father is perfect.” (Matthew 5:43-48)

If Christian love were a feeling and emotion how would it be possible to love our enemies? Enemies are, by common definition, the people we do not love because they have in some way offended us or they are out to destroy us. But, perfect love is not a feeling. Perfect love is a choice to obey and love in action even when the feelings aren’t there. Perfect love is a choice rather than a feeling, perfect love is the kind that sacrifices our own selfish ambitions for the good of others, and without that kind of love we are not actually true disciples of Jesus:

“Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes from God. Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God. Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love. This is how God showed his love among us: He sent his one and only Son into the world that we might live through him. This is love: not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins. Dear friends, since God so loved us, we also ought to love one another. No one has ever seen God; but if we love one another, God lives in us and his love is made complete in us.

This is how we know that we live in him and he in us: He has given us of his Spirit. And we have seen and testify that the Father has sent his Son to be the Savior of the world. If anyone acknowledges that Jesus is the Son of God, God lives in them and they in God. And so we know and rely on the love God has for us. God is love. Whoever lives in love lives in God, and God in them. This is how love is made complete among us so that we will have confidence on the day of judgment: In this world we are like Jesus. There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love.

We love because he first loved us. Whoever claims to love God yet hates a brother or sister is a liar. For whoever does not love their brother and sister, whom they have seen, cannot love God, whom they have not seen. And he has given us this command: Anyone who loves God must also love their brother and sister.” (1 John 4:7-21)

Christian love is preemptive. Christian love follows the example of Jesus who loved us BEFORE we loved him. True love is not based in initial attraction nor does it wait in fear of not being reciprocated. True love steps out in faith. Perfect love is not a pursuit of an immediate feeling or instant gratification.

Love is a choice to invest in the good of another person even when we do not feel like they are worth our investment. Love means a choice to obey and the choice to obey is a choice to follow the example of Jesus.

So, if love is a choice, then feelings do not matter?

No, not exactly. I do believe feelings do matter. But, a love based primarily in initial superficial attraction is a shallow love and deep love is only possible with deep (and self-sacrificial) commitment. Deeper love is a continual choice to love more than a fleeting feeling of love. For that reason we should be emphasizing the choice to love over the feeling of love and not the other way around.

This is not to say that those who started with a feeling of superficial attraction never develop depth of relationship—some do and some do not. But I will say that love that is a choice and a commitment in faith is starting at a deeper level. The better love is not a feeling. The better love is a choice to put aside fear (or hate) and invest in the betterment of another person. It is a love that is based in faith rather than feeling.

If love is a matter of will rather than a determined or predestined fate, then when a person says that they cannot love a person what they are really saying is that they unwilling to love that person. The feelings can never develop in a person who is not willing to step out in faith. Therefore, if you want to find love, be willing to bring love into the world and give it away in faith.

Love first. Plant seeds of love in the world. Do not wait on feelings to arrive before investing in the good of others. Do not expect the Spirit of God to come to you (or the world) unless you live in obedience to the command to follow Jesus and love self-sacrificially by his example. Love before you expect love to arrive. Yes, this is absolutely a paradox, a causality dilemma, but that is the nature of our reality in a quantum universe.

Do not be resigned to an idea that we are haplessly tossed about without a will of our own. Instead, consider the last lines of Invictus, “I am the master of my fate: I am the captain of my soul.” Choose to love supernaturally. Be a co-creator of a higher and deeper love rather than a mere consumer of the feelings produced by base human nature.

The People Want a King…, Part 1

I felt like the dog who finally caught the car. I was perplexed with a question: Now what?

My goal in blogging is to make a difference with the ideas that I share. I know ideas are powerful. I want to share good ideas and debunk or discourage destructive ideas. It has been my goal from the beginning to write things worthwhile in hope of creating dialogue.

It was exciting when Good Men Do Not Blame Women quickly surpassed my previously most viewed blog in a matter of hours. It was also terrifying that my words were being read by hundreds of people rather than just the usual handful of friends and followers.

But, amid worries about if I had proofread enough and given fair treatment to a complex topic, I enjoyed my new found popularity. I enjoyed it so much that I worried that I enjoyed it too much.

I worried that maybe I was ‘going negative’ instead of sharing something helpful and constructive. Just a week or so prior I had remarked to a friend that people who criticize other people (not like them) seemed to build a fan club quicker than those who shared good ideas.

I had to think there’s a danger of becoming a different version of what we preach most passionately against. I do not want to contribute in an overreaction in the opposite direction and abandon what is good in proper order or at the right priority level.

I had a taste of power that I both liked and that I did not like. It provoked many questions in my mind about what would happen if I gained a following. Would I be an example of the ideals in my mind of leadership? Or would I insulate myself from criticism and become arrogant?

“Power tends to corrupt, and absolute power corrupts absolutely. Great men are almost always bad men.” (Lord Action)

The good news is that my blogger stardom was very short lived and—besides a few new friends—I’m back to blogging to my usual small audience. It means less pressure. I feel I can share again without worrying as much about my imperfections being amplified over a large audience.

The people want a king to lead them…

In the beginning God was sufficient to lead his people. The patriarchy of Abraham gave way to tribal elders and officers. Later Moses acted as a prophet and arbitrator in disputes. However, eventually it was too much for Moses, the task was taking all of his time from “morning to evening,” which led to his visiting father-in-law to ask him why:

“Moses answered him, “Because the people come to me to seek God’s will. Whenever they have a dispute, it is brought to me, and I decide between the parties and inform them of God’s decrees and instructions.” Moses’ father-in-law replied, “What you are doing is not good. You and these people who come to you will only wear yourselves out. The work is too heavy for you; you cannot handle it alone. Listen now to me and I will give you some advice, and may God be with you. You must be the people’s representative before God and bring their disputes to him. Teach them his decrees and instructions, and show them the way they are to live and how they are to behave. But select capable men from all the people—men who fear God, trustworthy men who hate dishonest gain—and appoint them as officials over thousands, hundreds, fifties and tens. Have them serve as judges for the people at all times, but have them bring every difficult case to you; the simple cases they can decide themselves. That will make your load lighter, because they will share it with you. If you do this and God so commands, you will be able to stand the strain, and all these people will go home satisfied.” (Exodus 18:15-23)

Moses took the advice, he delegated the task of settling disputes to other capable men and that became the system for hundreds of years.

It was a sort of anarcho-theocracy. The prophet was the liaison between God and the people, the messenger of God, but not a ruler per se. The laws handed down by Moses were the standard for judgment. Enforcement of the law was carried out by the people rather than delegated to a few people and judges a final arbitrator between parties as needed…

“At that time the Israelites left that place and went home to their tribes and clans, each to his own inheritance. In those days Israel had no king; everyone did as they saw fit.” (Judges 21:24-25)

There was a time after the Exodus of freedom from oppression and obligation. Judges came and went as heroes who did God’s work to save the people from captivity. Judges were representatives and deliverers of the people, but not rulers like a king. However, eventually, when a worthy successor could not be found for Samuel amongst his sons, the elders of the people made a fateful demand:

“So all the elders of Israel gathered together and came to Samuel at Ramah. They said to him, “You are old, and your sons do not follow your ways; now appoint a king to lead us, such as all the other nations have.” But when they said, “Give us a king to lead us,” this displeased Samuel; so he prayed to the Lord . And the Lord told him: “Listen to all that the people are saying to you; it is not you they have rejected, but they have rejected me as their king. As they have done from the day I brought them up out of Egypt until this day, forsaking me and serving other gods, so they are doing to you. Now listen to them; but warn them solemnly and let them know what the king who will reign over them will claim as his rights.” (1 Samuel 8:4-9)

Samuel went on to warn how kings would take their sons for wars and daughters as workers. He spoke of how the future kings would take the best of their possessions for themselves and for their own purposes. Still, despite the warning, he did not persuade them, the chapter continues:

“But the people refused to listen to Samuel. “No!” they said. “We want a king over us. Then we will be like all the other nations, with a king to lead us and to go out before us and fight our battles.” (1 Samuel 8-19-20)

The people were delusional just like their forefathers who begged Moses for a return to slavery and Egypt. Despite Samuel’s warning of conscription, they apparently had an idea a king could miraculously do all the fighting for them and they ignored all rational concern.

A couple of the kings were good, David and Solomon notable examples, but a majority were more concerned with themselves, they all took special privileges for themselves and loaded the people down with increased burdens. The prophecy of Samuel became reality—the people traded their greater freedom for a false security and eventual rule of tyrants. Instead of protecting against oppression the kings became oppressors themselves.

Consequence #1: Increased Burden

“A government big enough to give you everything you want is a government big enough to take from you everything you have.” (Gerald R. Ford)

Kings and government leaders promise big things to their people. But what often is forgotten by the enthusiastic crowds is that nothing is free. When a Pharaoh promised a pyramid for the glory of ~~Egypt~~ Pharaoh, he wasn’t planning to build it on his own time with godlike powers. No, the people paid the price of a king’s grandeur with their own backs and we still bear the weight of the audacious promises of our leaders.

The burdens never seems to be lightened either. Consider when Rehoboam took over after his father Solomon and was confronted by the people:

“Your father put a heavy yoke on us, but now lighten the harsh labor and the heavy yoke he put on us, and we will serve you.” … The king answered the people harshly. Rejecting the advice given him by the elders, he followed the advice of the young men and said, “My father made your yoke heavy; I will make it even heavier. My father scourged you with whips; I will scourge you with scorpions.” (1 King 12:4-14)

King Reheboam was more concerned with pleasing his young peers than he was in listening to the people or the elders. As a result some did not accept his rule over them and the nation was divided. It is interesting to see this same pattern play out today. Leaders pursue their own vision, they increase the burden on the people without ever easing up, which leads to division and eventual rebellion.

Consequence # 2: Increased Corruption

“Our country is now taking so steady a course as to show by what road it will pass to destruction, to wit: by consolidation [of power] first, and then corruption, its necessary consequence.” (Thomas Jefferson)

Kings and government leaders represent a consolidation of power and with consolidation of power comes increased opportunity for corruption. Many leaders rise to power on their idealistic vision, but once they have power the vision fades and the desire to hold or increase power becomes the bigger priority. We may call it “special interests” and political pandering today, but here’s how the Bible describes it:

“See how the faithful city has become a prostitute! She once was full of justice; righteousness used to dwell in her—but now murderers! Your silver has become dross, your choice wine is diluted with water. Your rulers are rebels, partners with thieves; they all love bribes and chase after gifts. They do not defend the cause of the fatherless; the widow’s case does not come before them.” (Isaiah 1:21-23)

Described above is the chipping away of principles. Many institutions of men are founded with good intentions but become corrupted over time. Corruption is a natural product of consolidation of power. When power is given to one person (or a small body of people) they seem to inevitably try to use that power to secure more power for themselves. There is no system of external controls that seems to be able to keep it in check. Those in power have the tools to manipulate the rules for their own gain.

Consequence #3 Loss Without Gain

“If the people cannot trust their government to do the job for which it exists – to protect them and to promote their common welfare – all else is lost.” (Barack Obama)

Kings and government leaders are established to protect the people against harm. But, not only do they fail to be able to protect a people from harm, they themselves often another source of harm.

The strength of a king is not in themselves as much as it is in the strength of their people. As Samuel had warned, a king takes and can only give back what is taken and thus a corrupted people produce corrupt leaders:

“You are destroyed, Israel, because you are against me, against your helper. Where is your king, that he may save you? Where are your rulers in all your towns, of whom you said, ‘Give me a king and princes’? So in my anger I gave you a king, and in my wrath I took him away.” (Hosea 13:9-11)

Installing a king ultimately did not solve anything. The people still ended up taken captive by other nations as they had before, they also endured the abuses of power hungry and corrupt leaders when not in captivity. They gave away freedom for security and got captivity because they were corrupted themselves.

People want a king to blame…

The paradox of kings is that kings need strong people to maintain power—but strong people don’t need kings. Weak people turn to leaders to do their work for them, but a man wearing a fancy crown and holding a scepter is only empowered by those who do his bidding.

It feeds a vicious cycle. When things go wrong people blame the king. As a result the king is driven to take more power upon themselves or risk losing power they already have. Of course, since their power is derived from other people this means taking more from the people who are able to give. It can only last so long as their are enough strong people to take from—when the weight of dependents comes closer to outweighing those able (or willing) to provide there is nothing a king can do but manage the decline.

Only, it is worse than that, because as already mentioned, consolidation of power is like a petri dish for corruption. So, not only do these kings give a convenient scapegoat, they also are too often the goats among the sheep and motivated by their own gain rather the good of all in the herd. In other words, if a couple sheep get thrown to the wolves and it saves a goat from an undesirable outcome and nobody notices, what sheep, right?

It is exactly what king David did to Uriah. David goofed, he got Uriah’s wife (Bathsheba) pregnant. He evidently didn’t want to suffer the political repercussions and attempted to hide the adultery. So plan ‘A’ was urge Uriah to spend some quality time with Bathsheba and thus disguise the origin of the pregnancy. Unfortunately Uriah, a true warrior, would not go home to his wife while his comrades were still fighting and David needed another plan. Plan ‘B’ was to deliberately set Uriah up to be killed in battle. It worked, except the prophet Nathan knew and he confronted the king with a story about a wealthy man who killed a neighbor’s pet sheep.

And David was one of the good kings and probably mostly because he could admit his sins…

This post is about faith, not kings…

My point here is not purely political or just historical. I am using kings and government leaders as a metaphor for anything (be it an institution, a system of philosophy or theology, a man, etc) that replaces our own obedience to God.

We cannot expect the world to be good if we continually delegate the tasks of our own conscience to others. Faith is about being the solution ourselves and not sending others (who we can conveniently blame for the eventual failure) to do what is impossible for them to do alone. We cannot expect the fullness of God’s blessing when we look to men to lead us. If God is alive in us then we must be the agents of good in the world with our own abilities and be faithful to our calling.

This is not a call for a return to anarcho-theocracy and judges either. Kings and governments rise in prominence because the people aren’t doing their jobs. Therefore, the solution is not to reform government, the solution is to reform people and make government irrelevant. If we were taking care of the widows and fatherless as we ought, for example, what need would there be for corrupt welfare programs? If fathers weren’t leaving their sons to be raised by the brutal streets, what need would their be for police as brutal?

“Every country has the government it deserves.” (Joseph de Maistre)

It is a collective problem when the people demand a king. It becomes an individual problem when the people finally empower a man to do their dirty work. There is always someone all too willing to seize power—those with an appetite for power—who will take the glory for themselves and then delegate responsibility for failure to others, exploits position, etc.

It is a spiritual problem. It is often only our own sloth, envy, pride, mistrust, fears, poor judgments and overreactions that are reflected back to us in the immoral whims of our leaders. We delude ourselves when we abandon accountability to God for kings that are no better than us.

Now, enough said for now, back to chasing cars for me…

Elusive Inconclusive Thoughts

I’m full of thoughts today.

I begin to write them, but I only get so far trying to tether them to word before they float away and then I’m on to trying to nail the next one down.

Up above my head is a canopy of these balloons of topics. The first of the day fading from sight, some with strings just escaped my fingers tips moments ago, and many in between as clumped together dots of varied color.

I started on theoretical physics. With that was a thought about coincidence, a thought about fortune and the quote “there but by the grace of God go I.” I found parallels to theology and scientific theory. I considered the evidence of extra-dimensionality of the universe and the multi-verse theories as similar to concepts of spiritual reality. I wanted to explain that science explains how and philosophy answers why. I got started.

My mind drifted…

My thoughts later turned to cycles and equilibrium. The need for both. I listed examples from nature. I wrote about the rise and fall of civilizations. I had an idea about the interplay of people and history. About the way living radical faith is eventually crowded out by dead religious tradition. I pondered three different responses of reaction, reformation or reflection and denial.

This too escaped…

Perhaps these balloons will come floating back down to where I can grab them and anchor them to explanation. But for now they remain abstractions not ready for words. Themselves the topic for their stubborn inaccessible.

I will let them play among the clouds for today, but eventually they must come down and earn their keep!

Keeping Things In Perspective

The problem with writing about a complex topic is that anything I write often feels incomplete.

Good writing is succinct. However, some ideas are hard to reduce to a few words. The difficulty of writing for me is often knowing what to include in an explanation and what to leave out. A writer can simultaneously say too little and too much.

When I finished my post last night I felt I had rambled a bit. Part of the problem is that I’m writing on a smart phone. I write between distractions and editing is not my forte. I know I have more I could say, but that post was already long and I could probably have left stuff out of it without losing much.

Besides that, I worried about alienating parts of my audience by speaking about a political figure and would rather not lose one of the handful of readers. I was dissatisfied with the result and enough that I nearly removed the post, but then I do not want to be a coward who only says what will win him the approval of peers or takes positions where he is most comfortable.

One of those things I did leave out was context. The history I mentioned of Christian and Biblical violence needs to be understood in the context of the times it took place. For example, the Crusades were not inexplicable or unusually brutal for the time, they were a response to the rapid expansion of another religion. Likewise, in Bible times, things like child sacrifice, slavery and exploitation of women were the norm—even more than today. Lest we forget, crucification was used by the ‘civilized’ Romans to punish crimes like theft. Torture was not a crime for much of human history.

I do believe, in context, the treatment of women, slaves and children was improved vastly by the teachings of Jesus. I believe Christian thought, despite the corrupted use of the religion, is a large part of why we in the west are experiencing the long peace that we are. That’s how movements work, results aren’t instant, there are relapses, counter movements and yet it is the long term trajectory that matters.

The more I study history the more I feel privileged to live in the world I do. In times past, even many places in the world today, I would have little time to fret about my writing skills or lack thereof. If it wasn’t shortage of food to worry about it would be the constant threat of being killed by the rival tribe or clan across the river.

Progress, like my writing, is always incomplete, but hopefully it is headed in the right direction and there are some things in the world worth celebrating. That these words could potentially reach someone on the other side of the world one of them.

God bless!

Amish Lies: I read it on the internet…, part 2

I was not planning to do a blog about immunization and autism. However, an article posted by a social media friend, along with comments from US Senator Rand Paul made recently, prompted my response. The article makes two claims about Amish, immunization and autism (presented in questions) in the title; and both claims turn out to be false.

Claim: Amish Do Not Vaccinate

It seemed plausible at first brush, especially given that this small Christian sect mandates an austere lifestyle and rejects many modern conveniences, that they would also not vaccinate. However, I have an advantage in that I know some Amish people. But, more significantly, I have a sister (Dr. Olivia K. Wenger, MD) who led a study on Amish and their attitudes towards vaccinations.

The research of Dr. Wenger and her colleagues, although addressing primarily the opinions of Amish parents about vaccinations and not vaccination rates, is sufficient to disprove the idea that Amish do not vaccinate. This is some of what they found:

“Among 359 respondents, most (68%) stated that all of their children had received at least one vaccine, and 14% of those surveyed said their children had received no vaccines.”

Amish, in fact most who responded in the study cited above, do vaccinate. So the idea that Amish do not vaccinate is a myth and lie. That false claim alone is enough reason to dismiss any other claim found in the article, but in case you are unconvinced, I will address the other claim in the title as well.

Claim: Amish Do Not ‘Get’ Autism

The anti-vaccination article claims there are only three known cases of autism amongst Amish people. Again, I could’ve accepted this as valid, but mostly because there’s a strong possibility of autism being undiagnosed in this community that is as insular and closed as the Amish community.

However, this too was easily refutable despite no studies directly addressing the topic. I found research, by Dr. D. Holmes Morton, MD and others, that triples the number of cases of Amish children with autism symptoms:

“In March 2006, Drs. Kevin
Strauss, Holmes Morton and others documented 9 autistic Amish children, which could raise the autism rate of Lancaster Amish community Olmstead supposedly investigated to almost 1/5,000 all by themselves.”

So, both claims are untrue based in readily available evidence. Unfortunately stories like this are posted as true over and over again by those who are anti-vaccination or sympathetic. It is soaked up as proof of a link between autism and vaccines, yet it is demonstrably false information.

If your primary cause is truth, then carefully vet your sources!

As a believer in individual freedom, religious liberty and one who is respectful of conscience, I am doubly offended by articles like this. Quite frankly I am embarrassed to see these types of spurious claims circulated by those associated with my political leanings and religious faith.

Yes, opposition to vaccinations crosses political and religious lines, but is often a topic of conversation amongst my Libertarian and Christian peers. That some of them regularly repeat this sort of thing as legitimate or present it without question is a source of serious frustration for me. It does a disservice to even good questions about vaccinations.

Nothing is gained by linking falsehoods to what is true. If anything, people who are not ignorant of science will ‘throw the baby out with the bathwater’ and reject all that is associated with the falsehood. In a world awash with information, why should they waste time on a source that lied to them once and/or doesn’t carefully vet their sources?

“Do not spread false reports.” (Exodus 23:1a)

I realize not everyone is a scientific or critical thinker. I myself struggle with the discipline required for serious research and that is part of the reason I would not make a career of it. That said, we do need to take responsibility for the information we disseminate online and owe others our due diligence verifying claims with reliable sources before repeating it.

Sadly, anonymous articles with sensational headlines garner more attention than these unsung heroes who are actively creating solutions for sick Amish children. There are sources far more reliable than an article that does not even include the name of the author. Professionals like Dr. Morton and Dr. Wenger have dedicated their careers to studying Amish genetics and medical disorders.

Footnote: I cite secondary sources for the research of Dr. Wenger and Dr Morton, but if you want to read the original studies, the links are below:

Underimmunization in Ohio’s Amish: Parental Fears Are a Greater Obstacle Than Access to Care

Recessive symptomatic focal epilepsy and mutant contactin-associated protein-like 2.

Promises of better things to come…

It has been an interesting year and a year of many firsts. I suffered my first torn anterior cruciate ligament (and hopefully my last) in May and spent most of the year rehabbing it.

I am the proud owner of my first brand new car. It is a handsome black 2014 Ford Fusion sedan with a five speed manual transmission and represents a vast improvement over my prior every day vehicles.

I have started my first real blog (unless a Xanga foray counts) and you are reading it.

Besides that, I have a first chapter to a book in rough draft form which is also a first for me. I hope that effort will eventually lead to a first of writing a book if I can find the time to research for the second chapter.

It has been a year of intense feeling, both trials and triumphs, both of deep doubt and deeper faith, with many prayers answered with one that still waits. Because the work is not finished, my theme from this past year will continue into the next year: With God (or faith) all things are possible.

I have faith God will continue to answer my prayers in amazing ways. Apparently fortune favors the bold, so I will be bold in faith and boldly predict next year to be my best ever. I do not expect all sunshine and roses, because bad days happen even in the best of circumstances, but I hope big regardless.

For next year I plan to continue doing what I am doing and improve at it. I want to continue writing with a goal of improving my ability to communicate ideas. I want to offer solutions where I can, to help encourage other people and strengthen the good side of things.

I want to continue to exercise regularly and remain physically fit despite a demanding schedule. I realize good health can’t be taken for granted. I know fitness, like all good things, isn’t something that happens accidentally, it is a result of initiative, work and God’s grace.

Speaking of work, I plan to continue driving, but will continue exploring options and hope to find something else by next year. I am still unclear where, what or when I will find the next opportunity. I have ruled nothing out. I pray for God’s guidance.

I also want to be more meditative and prayerful. I hope to read more, stay involved in spiritual development and active in the lives of others. I pray to be a voice for faith, hope and love. I want to grow stronger in all areas of life, be confident and live without excuses.

It is our bigger fights of faith that we have the most opportunity to grow and that is what I take into next year. And, you can be a part of that, I do invite your input and about this blog in particular. I would love feedback about the content and clarity of my writing.

Are there any topics you prefer of those I have posted on or suggestions of things I should discuss less or more?

Anyways, my work is nearly done for this year, a new year (even if just an arbitrary boundary) is a few hours away, and it is definitely an opportunity to reflect. So, as I sit here with my tuna fritters and miracle whip ready to eat, anticipating a night full of activity, let me first thank you all for being a part of my life in 2014 and wish a happy new year…